Ketchup is God's man juice
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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