Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
How naked do you want me to be?
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