i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
