let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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