I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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