Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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