So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
