Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize