I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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