Ambien. No doubt about it.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
My penis needs a shock collar
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Randomize
