i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
