I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
We need to rekindle our bromance
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
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