He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
