I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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