So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
