id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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