She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
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