uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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