Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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