i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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