im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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