I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
