i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
