the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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