It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
