M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Two words: blizzard sex
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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