oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
pop tarts are not kleenex
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
