I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Randomize
