Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
