Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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