I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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