butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Randomize