I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Randomize