I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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