dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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