White coat. Heels.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
