He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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