We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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