I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
