Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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