i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
