kristin has been a bad kristin
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
