Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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