Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
This girl is more easily done than said...
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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