Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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