id be glad to
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
17 year olds will be the death of me.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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