OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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