What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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