I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
