rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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